Apoopi

The fact that I was first to the plantation car park didnt make me feel good, or virtuous - it made me feel that everyone else knew something I didnt, that it would be rubbish and that I should have gone to the wall. It wasnt actually raining, but the roads were wet, and when I got up there so were the rocks. More or less. Snow on the ground, and atop the blocs, plus in cracks and where you would generally put your hands. It wasnt wet enough that I could, with clear concience, just go back to the wall but it wasnt going to be an amazing morning. Had I been out in the last few weeks I wouldnt have bothered, but as I'd been cooped for so long, i persisted.

A bit disappointing really. Had to towel off the Green traverse. Did it three times, then did it backwards twice, then did ron's reach, then GT there and back. This is a good warm up. Harris and Muesli turn up. They warm up, I go over to the Ace.

By jimeney its hard. Get a bit of knowledge from Haggis and Muse, but it seems to involve crushing the tops of your knuckles against the top of the crack, and is a bit unpleasant. I do the first move a couple of times, even managing to get my left foot out and round and into the crack by my hand, but being able to move out of that position and therefore into the joker start is going to be Hard. Note capitalisation. I realise I need to make specific fingerboard programme if I am to succeed.

Move to Help The Young. Actually, not to HTY, but to a Travs thing just left of it. Back in the YMCA. It looks well easy. 7B+ they said. All sorts of thoughts about Travs being generous flash through my mind, and I think I will just do this, then I'll go and get on HTY. Its desperate. Not only do I blow the flash, but I don't do it at all. Each time I end up scrunched up in the high pocket, unable to jab my foot over the overlap onto a smear. Its wierd, off balance and I feel a rubberised shin pad would yield more success.

I've done HTY before - from standing. Theres a sitter, which Adam showed me years ago. He made it look really easy, basically clamping the fin between his forearms. I couldnt even pull on. But, I had mentioned as much to Sam and to Arthur Haggis and they suggested an alternative method (and that Adam was a gimp), which I tried and managed not only to move, but to almost do two moves. Got quite excited, but realised I had left it too late, warmed up too much and burnt all my beans.

Harris nearly does the Travs thing. I have another go, get no higher and sack it off home. As I walk down I see Sam and Lu, Ian and Percy. Two lovely couples holding hands. It starts to drizzle. Here endeth the weekend of climbing. It looked like Sunday was the better day, but when your slot is booked, you have to take what you can get.

Went to the board last night. The left hand side of Dowel Syndrome still resists my advances, but it WILL yield. Nearly did it on the right again. Get a new one off John Welford, who has had a week of sickness and claims to be weak. I want to be weak like you John! (legend). Will stick it on the wiki later. Later, much later, Sam and harry join me and do a bit. Sam looks well lean. We start talking about weight. He is roughly the same height as I, and is a full stone lighter. Shit! when I weigh myself at the end of each day, I am about 11st10lbs. Sam is 10st10.... Imagine if I was his weight? I would be awesome. Think its because i have done no CV exercise for months. Dont think I could sustain that weight for long, but could drop half a stone I would be bionic.

Finally, when I arrived last night I get chatting to Lu who, bless her, has swallowed the Accapi sales manual. I didnt know who they even were before, and I have to be honest, I am hugely sceptical. Basically its a baselayer type of long sleeved top about which some fairly outlandish claims are made. I havent read the blurb, or digested the science, but its something to do with metals and infrared? and by wearing it you recover better and it heals your injuries, and you will climb 8b... erm yeah. Fernando Alonso reckons it reduces G Force!!! so a t shirt reduces gravity? f*cking awesome! where do I sign? This has to be psychosomatic. Anyway, i would try it but the price is prohibitive - £150 for a t-shirt. Would be interesting to see if it works, but I have not the funds. Besides I would need a huge one to cover my paunch.