Ben's Thrape

"We should really have gone to Malham" I thought as I drove towards Caley. But as the afternoon's meeting wore on, my early dart drifted out the window. Foley is corruptible I thought as I sewed the seed of Caley in the concealed text message sent from beneath the desk, and sure enough, the plan changed. By the time I skidded to a halt in the layby besides the 'road of death' I was frothing with excitement. Changed, threw heap of stuff inside a pad and scuttled up to fingerknacker crack. Greasy. Rabbits Paw Wall, Otley Wall, New Jerusalem, Manson's Wall - it all went in to the warm up circuit at a suprisingly quiet crag. Then the main event. Zoo Log. Only somehow I didnt feel ready, and besides, I have wanted to try Ben's Groove with a spotter for ages - still too scary, still couldnt move my foot at the top, still bottled out.

Folog wanted to go on the Secret Seventh. I had only done it the once, but love showing off and felt I could do it again, so under the guise of showing him the way, got stuck in. 15,000 goes later I found myself swimming through green bulges to get on top. You know that feeling when you have done the crux but the top isnt quite as easy as you remembered but you're committed and you have to push on? tick.

So now at last Zoo York. I think I must've taken the edge off with my minimum rest, hundreds of goes, trying really hard strategy on SS. I didnt feel sparky. Did it from stand again. Next link I wanted was to do it from the 2p edge and the undercut. Never failed on the undercut move, but holding the cut loose and getting your heel back on is going to be the redpoint crux. Feel wildly out of control and like superhuman tenacity is required (note to self, need to siphon Paul Reeve's blood). Oli Wright (old skool hero) turns up and sets about claiming not to know how to do Ben's Groove. There are two other lads beneath it now, only they have brought dust sheets with them rather than pads so when Oli throws his on the pile I see my chance and scuttle over to join them. The boulder of death beneath it now suitably subdued, I can try with impunity. Oli does it easily, but looks gripped on top. Often when I see someone else get gripped it sort of makes me feel better as I realise I'm perhaps not such a shithouse and that its ok to be scared. Anyway, I thrutch and hump and find myself mantling to glory too. Huzzah! have actually done something! Nothing better than unexpected-late-season-after-work-ticking.

Folog is trying BlockBuster. Various discussions on the motion in the ocean and the state of the bulb ensue, but none of them yield success. I keep nearly doing it (channel surfer) then with a 'sickening thrape' (foley) off the crimp I skin my knuckles. Blood gushes forth. We pack up and wander down to the crystal method. Its now after 8 and dusky. As when I went with Ned I have no concept of how I did this. Being told how to do stuff is like driving with Sat Nav, you pay no attention to what you did, just follow instructions. By the time we leave skin is well and truly flayed and I am beaten. Its 2045 and not completely dark. Hot foot it to the car, to a chippy in horsforth and manage to make it back to sheffield (including chip stop) in an hour.

Last night I got a text from Folog saying that Paul Reeve had added his name to the list of Unjustified ascentionists. He must be so pleased - I dont think he has climbed 8c yet, although not without trying! Good effort.

I knew Edlog was going to go on West Side story last night, and as you can see it without getting out of the car, so like an old couple who take their honda out to the countryside to sit in it and read the paper, she and creepily watched him through binoculars from across the valley. Jim and Jonboy were also out trying Western Eyes. Jon did it, Jim raced around trying everything, Edlog persists with his wack foot sequence and gets to the top every time but never to the jug.